Your catharsis

Wish I could make beautiful music. Beautiful, touching, painful. Music that would slice through you, rip you apart, stab every particle of being, every moment of pain.

Toss me a line, throw me a hand. Watch pain spread like blood. Warm me in its flow.

Letting go is more memorable than holding on, chasing who knows what. Expectation is the root cause of all sorrow. Illusions mirage the only reality, pain.

Nature is not you. Camouflage yourself. Do not believe in god.

It is not a comfortable world out there. There are knives and they lie, cheat, deceive. They are out to get you. I revel in your betrayal. I fall prey to the world's madness. Who has ever been your friend? Death of a soldier is a number.

As it rains, I dance. Life runs in circles, thought of a good life acts trigger.

No! Time to let it out. Time to wake up to nothingness, to blindness. Do not give me a sign! Do not give me a fantasy, a hope! Lose myself in that quicksand. Phase the darkness. Merge with my world in insignificance. Your true creation. I see it. Wish I did not know hope! The wrong side. Helplessness grips.

Fall slave to music in my moment of weakness.